Review: The Simpsons “The Town”

I was born in a small-town.

Spoilers (Naturally) Follow

The same day that Tom Brady is returning from his suspension, the Simpsons are shipping up to Boston to make sure he knows how much of a cheater he is. Or rather, they are “hate-cationing” in Beantown so that they can stick it to the very Patriots-esque Boston Americans. (I guess this is more or less confirmation that the Simpsons Springfield is not the Massachusetts one.)

The final straw for Homer regarding Boston football comes from the one-two punch of the Americans beating the Springfield Atoms on a sneaky last-minute play in which their mascot is an eligible receiver and then discovering that his son is a traitor in his eyes. It turns out that Boston, with its tales of departed Southies and prankster tea partiers, is the “Bart Simpson of cities.” To prove that this is really a town of cheaters and hooligans, Homer wrangles his family straight to the source, but what ends up happening instead is a love affair. Lisa is ecstatic about the academic culture, Marge is won over by the sensible progressivism, and even Homer finds what he is looking for, via the third ball offered by the duckpin bowling alley.

It is a little disorienting at first to see Homer so football-obsessed. The drowning of sorrows at Moe’s Tavern is not usually about athletic despair so much as it is about general life despair. But Homer is and always has been a sort of All-American Dad, so he can slot into certain stereotypes without too much fuss. This is all a roundabout way of saying that his loyalty feels a little bit shallow. Bart, on the other hand, establishes his connection on a spiritual level. He is not betraying his hometown because his personal identity is more important.

What ends up coming together in the simply, but effectively, titled “The Town” is a parallel series of disappointments. Homer and Bart are not always this sympathetic, and it is gratifying to see them this way, even though it can be a little heartbreaking. Homer’s style of loyalty is typical among most sports fans, but this is a special strain. The Boston Americans’ transgressions are hardly exaggerations of the Patriots’. Using magnets to affect the coin toss may sound silly, but no sillier than deflating balls. Obviously Homer is not going to just accept that sports are no big deal, so in his own way, refusing to back down against Boston’s aggressive forced loyalty is kind of heroic.

Bart unfortunately does not have the same opportunity to take such a stand. Really, he is the victim of bad luck. There surely must be Southie crew out there making big scores, but Bart just happens to come across the one that is donating to Rwanda. This is just a lesson inherent to growing up: the real thing does not always live up to the legend, because legends are the exception. It feels a little weird to say this, but I think it’s appropriate: “It gets better, Bart.”

Lisa’s disappointment is not as upsetting (to the audience) as her brother’s, because she is living in a utopia. It is certainly lovely that she gets have to Doris Kearns Goodwin (voicing herself) teaching her for a little while, but living among the more diverse and more unpredictable Springfield crowd has molded her character in ways she should be happy for. Besides, her self-delusion at the end that she is still in Boston is kind of charming.

The final reversion to status quo is usually just the way things go on TV, but in this case it is also what is best for everybody, even if they do not realize it. And so we have an episode in which the laughs are not too hearty, but they are plentiful, and the lessons are important.

Memorable Lines and Random Jazz:

-Native Bay Staters Bill Burr, Michael Chiklis, Rachel Dratch, and Dana Gould provide the guest voices. Dratch is the only one clearly recognizable (thanks to her “Boston Teens” SNL sketches), but the others undoubtedly make the Boston milieu authentic.

-Some excellent sportscasting work from Harry Shearer: “The QB handsomely takes the snap, sexily steps back to pass, and with God-given good looks, fires it downfield!”

-Thanks to Lisa, now we know that bobbleheads are like quicksand: “No, don’t struggle! It only makes them bobble harder!”

-“So don’t is mine.”

-“Our problems are who we are, not where we are.”

-“Not to mention the unspoken racism.” “It wasn’t that unspoken.”