Comics Review: Axe Cop: The American Choppers #2
The evil axe monsters are taking over! Don’t worry, Axe Cop is on the case!
Spoilers Below
I was riding a pretty decent high after the first issue. I was glad to see Axe Cop to get a monthly run, even though it was for a miniseries. Well, unfortunately, that high came crashing down to Earth real quick. Here’s the recap.
The evil axe invasion is in full effect, and when they kill someone, they return as an evil axe person. But when the new body dies, the axe lives on. The team is in a situation where they can’t win, so they hop on Wexter (the most badass T-Rex ever), and they’re out. They make it to the Gold House, where the Ham Chef is secured. He put the priority on the chef over the team, and that can never be good. Apparently, it’s a good idea to stake out the Axe Factory with a camp. Everyone has their missions, with Axe Goat making his way inside the factory. It’s a bad thing when the factory is manned by demon lumberjacks bent on killing Axe Cop. Axe Goat reported back to Axe Cop, but he doesn’t understand goat. Axe Dog builds a translator, and implants it in Axe Goat, who retells the fact that it was the Chainsaw Force Three.
They used to be normal lumberjacks, who ventured into the Dark Woods. They cut into the woods, and a purple smoke leaked out. They breathed it in, and became demons. They were cast down into hell to serve Satan. Axe Cop saved one, because he only had one extra mask. The other three made it to Hell, when they were tasked with destroying Axe Cop. They couldn’t get a job at the Gold House, so they attacked in a different direction: the axe factory. They opened a crevice to Hell, where the evil leaked into the city, giving birth to the evil axes. Axe Cop wants to fight them, even though they can’t win. After fighting for a second, like an idiot, they piled into the RV. Stealth was engaged, and the demons were tricked. The axes turned on the Chainsaw Force Three, turning them into evil axe demons. Satan rose again, because the axes made him more powerful.
Axe Cop wants to retreat to the Gold House, which is the worst idea. Instead, we’re going to Captain Axe’s uncle’s. Captain Axe offered Axe Cop General Munch, and watched intently as Axe Cop dropped dead. General Munch has a poison that only poisons Generals from General Planet, and they fed it to Axe Cop, but the others all think Captain Axe has lost it. The uncle fled, but Captain Axe and Super Axe begin to brawl. That is, until Mr. Chicken Chicken hypnotizes Captain Axe. God told Chicken Chicken to tell the Choppers to stop fighting. Chicken tells the group how his belief in God made him a good man, and will help the crew get to Heaven to fight Satan. They get to Heaven, and Axe Cop’s secret Dad is going to heal him.
Wait, what the hell did I just read? If the sneak preview for the next issue holds true, Axe Cop is going to be an angel. I get Satan, because he is the root of all evil, but Axe Cop died because of a toxin? At least they broke the standard for this. Axe Cop is a walking Deus ex machinima, and it was pretty great to see that Dark Horse didn’t rely on it. This doesn’t make a lot of sense to me. This is the first time I’ve had to say this, but the entire issue felt like I was being forced to finish it. I didn’t have a lot of enjoyment from the beginning.
The book was rather boring to me and they have a lot of work to do if they want to get back on track for the finale next month.
