Review: Legends of Chamberlain Heights “Legends of Lockup”

Hope you kids aren’t sick of OJ!

Spoilers Below

The homies try to holla at some females but they aren’t getting any play because girls don’t like scrubs, they like thugs. At the same time three dudes in ski masts rob a Crippy Crème right next to the basketball court where the homies are hanging out. The police roll up quickly and mistake the Shit Crew for the criminals, which ends up slightly turning on the same chicks that turned down the homies earlier. Grover and Jamal get beat down by the police while Milk just stands there. Apparently he’s got immunity, or I guess they call it “rights”.  The crew is loaded into the police squad car and the girls start flockin’. Pathetic. The funny thing here is that while Jamal and Grover are being beat down and treated like shit, Milk is being pampered by the police. They hold his hand while walking him to the car, give him hot cocoa and a blanket and even kiss him on the head. This shit is so stupid its hilarious.

Baby Jordan Juvie is where the boys will be spending some of their hard time. Its not so bad, they got bottomless fries, a ball pit and the homies are even some of the best basketball players in the joint. The homie are taking over the yard. They are the top of the food chain here. I’m willing to bet they aren’t going to want to leave until they run up against some real criminals. The crew ends up getting visited by their families, and upon seeing the inside of juvie he snaps and goes off. I don’t blame him. The boys visit “Air Warden” who informs them they’re getting transferred to Woodpecker Bay, the toughest prison in Chamberlain Heights.

Malik has gone through a total change. He has gone from the knowledgeable young street brother, to a drug pushing stereotypical hood dude. His entire morals have changed. I can’t blame him, for as much time as he has put trying to be righteous and care about his people, they keep ending up making bad decisions to get locked up.

As the Shit Crew gets dropped off at Woodpecker Bay, one of the inmates has a Shawshank Redemption moment, saying “The first time I saw the Legends, I knew they weren’t ready for the life”. Haha, damn… this can only mean things are about to get a lot worse. Turns out that inmate who was providing the Shawshank style voice over is none other than O.J. Simpson, or simply “The Juice” as he goes by now. Anyway, the boys end up getting their prison jobs. Grover is with the Hispanics making “Air Force Juans”, Jamal is with the gays making weaves, and Milk is with the Friends of Izlam. The friends of Izlam see something in Milk and are going to try to convert him. Grover and Jamal on the other hand are at risk of losing their manhood.

Back in Chamberlain heights, Malik is running the game. His drug dealing business is going through the roof, hes dropping a mixtape and is becoming a straight up menace. He’s becoming a street legend.

The Shit Crew is thinking that life in the slammer really ain’t that bad. Baron, one of the inmates even comes to offer the boys some cornbread. Yo…DO NOT EAT THE CORNBREAD! JAMAL NO! Luckily O.J. steps in and prevents the boys from entering a peace treaty they wanted no parts of. If you are fortunate enough to not know what I am referring to, OJ breaks it down perfectly. If they had taken the corn bread, they would have ended up being somebody’s prison bitch. The boys are are fitting in their respective areas, and learning how to survive in prison. Everything seems kosher until Brother Davis from the Friends of Izlam gets poisoned by the Mexicans. Now, the Friends of Izlam want Milk to kill one of the Mexicans in an act of revenge. The Mexicans also want Grover to kill one of the Friends of Izlam. In both cases, if the homies don’t go through with their hits, they’re going to get killed themselves. Its only been 48 hours and the boys have gotten themselves into some deep shit. They realize quickly that neither one of them are ready to actually kill someone. They end up calling Montrell to get some advice. Luckily for the Shit Crew, Montrell has actually thought ahead and gotten his friend Shea Butter to represent the boys in court. Shea Butta has been arrested 35 times and never been to jail, so he MUST know what he is talking about.

In court, Butta does a hell of a job proving the boys innocence. Witness after witness he bring new light to shine on the fact that the Shit Crew did not commit the crime they had been mistakenly charged of. He even gets Michael Jordan to come in and prove that Grover isn’t wearing Jordan brand sneakers, a crucial fact to the case, as the true perpetrator was wearing Retro Space Jam Edition Jordan 11’s. These are extremely nice sneakers, and with a word from his airness himself, it is proven that Grover, Jamal, and Milk are innocent. Unfortunately, at the end of the trial Shea has to reveal his real name Raymond Ray Rutherford, and gets arrested for all of his outstanding warrants. He boldly sacrificed himself for the Shit Crew’ freedom, and this has an effect on Malik, making him denounce his recent transformation and go back to his old ways. All’s well that ends well as the boys end up still getting played by the same girls that played them before they went in the joint.

As much as I hated seeing the boys in prison, it was entertaining to see how they each adapted to the prison life, and it actually seems that in Grover and Milk’s case they were learning things that might impact them once they returned to civilization. I was disappointed in Malik when he ditched his morals and became the very thing he hated, a stereotype. Although I will say that I was slightly impressed by the song he rapped this episode, lil’ dude got flow. I was even more impressed with Shea Butta, and what seemed like his noble sacrifice to prove the boys innocence at the cost of his own freedom. Did he know it would go down like that when he decided to represent the boys? The addition of O.J. and Michael Jordan were the icing on the cake.  This episode could’ve gone a lot worse, as the boys could’ve had every single one of the worst imaginable prison horror stories happen to them, but they all made it out and in good health. I wonder if this is the last we’ll see of Shea, or if he will be back next season?