REVIEW: King Star King – “The Sting of Alfonzo Molestro”

 

!!!Spoilers To Follow!!!

Mourning the loss of Snow White at the hands of Spring Bunny and God Star God, we find King Star King and the gang back at the waffle joint, with Hank Waffles cleaning up the mess and both Pooza and Goebbels drinking as much syrup as inhumanly possible. Unfortunately for the gang, not evan a lap dance can cure King Star King of the sorrow of finally consummating his relationship with Snow White, only to lose her as a direct result.

Strangely enough, the only way to get closure on the ordeal is to visit the severed, but still bleeding and talking, head of Snow White. After accidentally throwing it in the fire, though, King Star King, the doctor reveals that there is a way to view the final moments of her life, showing that the nefarious Alfonzo Molestro is the man responsible for the remnants of her body.

With Goebbels on the scent, they make quick order of finding Molestro’s hideout. With their new high powered waffle joint ship, they arrive at the hideout to find Snow White still being molested, albeit without her body. All it takes is one quick hit of King Star King’s unidentified drugs and the gang finds themselves inside the lair. Waffles gets the worst of it, though, as Alfonzo Molestro works magic on his testicles, before perverting the minds of both Pooza and Goebbels.

As for King Star King himself, a deep fried appearance is in order until he takes in enough alcohol to fight back with his anus, shooting fire from his nether regions and burning the skull of Molestro. That still leaves Snow White to be put back together with the help of the gods, however.

After a failed revival ceremony, an existential crisis from Waffles, and a hasty burial, we see that Snow White isn’t quite dead, in fact. Buried deep beneath the floating bit of Earth that the waffle restaurant sits on, Snow White hangs in the balance.

What will happen next? Will the gang discover Snow White? Will King Star King ever be sober? Why is his friend named after the Nazi minister of propaganda? Find out next time, on King Star King. Trust me, I’m waiting for the answers as anxiously as you are.