English Dub Review: Conception “My Child, Welcome!”

This “Dating Game” will see this “Average Joe” find “The Flavor of Love in the Wild” with “The Cougar”!

OVERVIEW (SPOILERS)

Mana decides to have everyone play “The Bachelor” for Itsuki…which is kind of weird to do at this point since there are only two un-ritualed girls left and it doesn’t seem like spending more time with the others is going to level up the Star Children. But yeah, things get underway and we learn more about Sue, maiden of Sagittarius who likes animals and has dead parents, and Mirei, maiden of Libra who likes studying magic. They get cozier and then it’s off to the Love Ritual.

So, that’s twelve Star Children. Just gotta beat the last impurity and the kissing cousins can go home, right? Well, no, turns out there’s a secret thirteenth room holding the source of all impurities, which apparently means there’s one more girl left to romance. Mana wonders who might be it, suggesting it might even be one of the guys! Then the credits show clips of Alfie, the caretaker lady of all the Star Children, despite the fact that she barely had any screen time in this episode at all. HMMM, I WONDER WHO THE THIRTEENTH MAIDEN COULD BE????

OUR TAKE

You know, I’ve said plenty of my piece regarding the last few episodes, but for all the just plain horrendous stuff they’ve done, at least they had some semblance of a plot structure. This felt like even the writers were trying to kill time and knock off these loose ends. The “Bachelor” parody was certainly one way to go with a show like this, though it really only makes me wonder about why they didn’t just go with this, to begin with. At least framing this whole story as the backstory for a trashy anime’s take on a reality show could potentially work itself out to a guilty pleasure kind of series. But then I remember what people like about reality shows, or competitions in general, that Conception doesn’t really have: stakes.

Yes, the main plot is about saving this world from impurities, but that’s pretty much an afterthought and definitely not the selling point of a game (or adaptation of said game) going to a fantasy world to romance multiple ladies to have powerful kids with. The fact that Itsuki spends just about an equal amount of time with each of the girls and has equally strong kids with each of them means that they all pretty much plateau in character development after having their respective Star Children. Putting aside the incredibly reductive implications of that, it also means the juicy drama of trash TV like “The Bachelor” can’t exist because no one has a chance to really rise or fall in rankings. This could have been “Total Drama Island” meets “The Bachelor” meets anime, and instead it’s just…boring. And I’d rather watch something horrible than boring.

If there’s one good thing I can say about this episode, it’s that it made me think about what could have been, which is more imagination than I’ve been inclined to give any of these episodes thus far. I haven’t made it secret how little I’ve enjoyed covering this show, but as long as I’m talking about it, I might as well pull some interesting possibilities out of my ass. So, good news for you, Conception, you get to leave decimal ratings and back to full integers! Though next time does not look nearly as promising, since we’ll be jogging in place with some guy time, likely followed by heading straight into the final battle. At the very least, it’s nice to know we’re almost done.