Here’s what Nickelodeon’s new 90’s block has to do to be good.

Yesterday it was announced that Nickelodeon was spinning off a new block of programming focused on reruns of popular 90s Nick shows like Rugrats, Rocko’s Modern Life, Hey Arnold, Angry Beavers and more.

But, the block known as The Splat is gonna have to do a lot more to win MY affection, starting with:

1. New Content: Yep, I don’t want just the returning franchises, I want new episodes of said returning franchises. And no, not the Doug that used to air on ABC’s One Saturday Morning, no…you can keep that shit to yourselves. I want brand-new episodes for all of the aforementioned franchises, and no I don’t want fucking spin-offs like All Growed Up. Ever listen to Sirius XM and some of the classic channels? Boneyard, Lithium, etc will often play brand-new tracks of bands from 20 to 30 years ago.
2. An ‘Adult’ section. Similar to how Cartoon Network became relevant, I think an adult-focused addendum to Nickelodeon would be pretty bad-ass. What if sister-network MTV took a bunch of their old animated franchises, and put them on starting at 10pm? Clone High, Beavis and Butthead, Daria, MTV’s got an impressive collection of animated franchises just collecting dust on their shelves…FIX IT!
3. Marathons. I want endless marathons of Rocko’s Modern Life, and I have NO interest in Kenan and Kel hosting any shit bits neither. Those two have jobs, let’s reminisce in peace.

Cartoon Network has successfully spun-off two networks…Adult Swim and Boomerang, the latter of which is now delving into originals. I hope Nick sees this blueprint, and runs with it. Oh yea, and bring back Ren & Stimpy.