Check Out This Un-Possibly Good Ralph Wiggum Cake

T-shirt and apparel company Threadless hosts a competition every year, called Threadcakes, which showcases the best user-submitted cakes based on their shirt designs. Here’s one that’s guaranteed to bend your wookie: Ralph Wiggum.

That’s right, the special little Simpsons second grader has a whole cake modeled after him, and it’s sure to be the best event in your life since the day the doctor told you that you didn’t have worms anymore.

“Cutout Ralph,” by graphic designer/cake artist Kylie Mangles of Freshly Squeez’d, is based on a shirt depicting a gnarly Wiggum, holding scissors, with half of his done missing. And by dome, I don’t mean the object under which Springfield was imprisoned during The Simpsons Movie.

The deliciously morbid dessert was constructed of red velvet cake, meringue buttercream, Rice Krispies treats, and fondant icing (but no paste) and really is astounding. I can barely cook a Hot Pocket without setting my kitchen on fire, so I find this especially impressive. Or perhaps my life is just especially depressing.

“I really wanted to pick a design that would be challenging and make me try some new things,” she said. “Well Ralph sure delivered on that. I have never made a cake with so many different colours of fondant or floating ribs before.

It apparently took Mangles five full 18-hour days to create, and substantially less time to consume.

Hopefully it didn’t taste like burning, or smell like cat food.