Shorts Review: Sports Friends ‘Marshawn and Steven’

Spoilers Below

Since the Seattle Seahawks pulled off an exciting victory against the San Francisco 49ers last Sunday – and thus will be appearing in next weekend’s Superbowl – it seems a fitting time to review the “Marshawn and Steven” episode of Sports Friends. It’s also fitting because this is the most recent, and last, new episode posted.

In this installment, running back Marshawn Lynch and kicker Steven Hauschka held a conversation on the sidelines as if they were making awkward watercooler talk at work for the first time (which is almost exactly what they were doing, since there was a Gatorade cooler between them.) You know what I mean, though: that uncomfortable small talk where you feel like you should know the other person – and are probably vaguely familiar with each other – but have never actually spoken.

“So…you’re…offense?” a clueless Steven asked at one point, to which Marshawn responded in the affirmative, adding that he’s “The Beast Mode Guy.”

After Hauschka stated he was on special teams, Lynch said, “I actually know a guy on special teams: John… Ryan…?” and they both pretended to bond over their mutual acquaintance.

In the end, Marshawn excused himself to go play, and they both said their goodbyes – until Steven noticed the offense wasn’t actually going onto the field, and realized that Lynch was just looking for a reason to leave.

This episode’s premise didn’t make a heck of a lot of sense (since the two have been teammates for a few seasons now) and there weren’t any real jokes to speak of, but dammit if the writers didn’t nail the awkward dialogue that always occurs in these situations. Each line was totally relatable, and each piece of body language was humorously familiar. Although there weren’t a lot of laughs, I still found myself smiling throughout.

And with that, Sports Friends is finished for now. So in closing, I’d like to wish the Seattle Seahawks the best of luck next Sunday… they’ll need it when they realize firsthand what they’re up against. After all, the Broncos’ quarterback has his own version of “Beast Mode,” but he just calls it being Peyton Fucking Manning.