REVIEW: CHOZEN “BEEF”

 

chozen

Warning Spoilers Below nnnnnnnnnnnatch

This week’s Chozen talks some real ish ’bout gayness and labels and all that. That’s real, and I appreciate the way it was handled using vernacular and non-give-a-fuckery that is easy to digest for my diamond clad ears. Bitch, you know my ears stay cold like a penguins ass crack YUP. Don’t even.

From having interviewed the creators of Chozen, I know firsthand (CUZ IM A MOFUCKING JOURNALIST) that a big part of Chozen’s identity is him being a “sex person” rather than a “gay person” – because in his eyes, he doesn’t think that him banging dudes is different, so there’s no need to label it as such. Is it ‘different’ statistically, sure, but does that really matter? Of course not. YEAH I SAID OF COURSE NOT. CALM DOWN YOU CONSERVATIVE BUTTMUNCHES.

Go ‘head witcho gay ass Chozen, no fucks given at this camp. Also, on that REAL real, I hope that like, maybe this will actually help for real gay peeps to feel better about their own identity struggles (I had never even really thought about that). OH SNAP MAYBE ILL INTERVIEW A GAY DUDE AND SEE WHAT HE THINKS ABOUT CHOZEN. Beezus Christ, I’m like fucking Horaldo Rivera in this bitch. Pullitzers, ready yourself – cuz imma need the turkey bruh (“It’s a bowling term” – MacGruber).

Oh, so plot and humor and shit.

Of all the episodes of Chozen so far, this had the least amount of gags and none of the approximately 2-3 songs within it were funny. Right. So that’s not like, amazing for laugh-ability (although I did manage to crack up once during one of Chozen’s fantasies – won’t spoil it for y’all) – but the episode was entertaining as a whole, so I can’t really hate. Shit was like, well rounded – like a wonderful butt cheek

(Authors note – yo, how is butt cheek not one word?! Surely it should be ‘buttcheek’ – get real, English language. From now on I’m spelling it like that way so you best just get used to it John “Always-be-tryina-spellcheck-a-brothas-word-makin” Blabber #DasMyEditorBruh).

Plot. Way more Phantasm than usual, which I was looking forward to. Although it physically pains me to say this because I idolize him musically and swag-ically – Method Man is the weakest of the voice talent on the show (due to lack of relative experience), BUT did a good/better job this week. I look forward for more opportunities to see him flex (his voice skills). Do you bruh, do you.

That’s all for this week. Mad words. I need to get my lazy ass on the treadmill.

It’s ya boy.

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