Review: Guardians of the Galaxy “Lyin’ Eyes”

This thing needs to be put down.

Spoilers Below

Remember that sarcophagus from last week? Yep, turns out this thing’s a bigger deal than originally thought and both Drax and Rocket lose it after a night of heavy gambling and probably drinking while playing an all-too-familiar game made famous by the feature-length Guardians film. The duo go all over the place looking for this thing and get into several run-ins with familiar faces from last season like the Believers and Mantis. Come to find out that despite being questioned about it earlier, Yondu had it this whole time. Unfortunately, the blue man with the mohawk doesn’t read the instructions before opening and is sucked in. No longer interested in cashing in on the valuable artifact, Rocket fills in the rest of the Guardians about the sarcophagus which leads to the team having to ship out and track it down before it destroys the universe.

Our Take

In terms of voice-acting, this show’s take on Yondu is maybe the worst, but really that’s a tough battle in it of itself. Everyone who was cast as part of the series is trying to do their best to cover Led Zeppelin, but are coming up sounding like Mini KISS and it’s starting to wear on me. Not to mention the fact that we have LITERALLY kicked off ANOTHER premise this season involving the tracking down and location of some sort of a trinket that swears to wipe us all out. To be quite honest, a few more weeks of this show I’m gonna start rooting for the villains to destroy us all because that’s going to be less painful than hearing dialogue blatantly ripped off from the feature film and fed to us mushed together like Gerber baby food.

With as bad as Ultimate Spider-Man was, at the very least it tried to do original takes on characters and story lines. Granted they failed miserably, but at least it was trying to be its own show. Guardians of the Galaxy is like a 9-year-old’s attempt at tracing the Blu-Ray cover art with crayons and then trying to pass that off as “original”. This thing’s a mess.

SCORE
4/10