English Dub Review: JoJo’s Bizarre Adventures Stardust Crusaders “Anubis Pt. 2”

Are you feeling it, Mr. Crab?

OVERVIEW (SPOILERS)

Polnareff’s still in his close shave from last week but learns the Anubis Stand has possessed the barber, and pieces together that the SWORD is actually the Stand. This doesn’t help for long though, as Anubis has learned from their first fight and is gaining the edge. Soon enough, he’s cornered and Silver Chariot is disarmed, saved only by Jotaro using Star Platinum to punch the barber out the window, though even he admits that punch took all he had.

Their fight goes outside, and Jotaro manages to catch and break the blade, knocking out the barber, who drops the rest of the sword. The two manage to get the broken blade back in the sheath, but they need to dispose of it quickly before things start up again. Jotaro suggests throwing it in the Nile River, but the cops arrive and try wrestling the sword out of Polnareff’s hands. This leads him to accidentally pulling the sword out, allowing Anubis to fully possess him, destroy the sheath, and attack Jotaro with the help of Silver Chariot.

Now, Jotaro is on the ropes, both fighting a friend he doesn’t want to kill with powers he’s never faced, plus an opponent who knows all of his moves. Not even catching the sword works a second time, though he does manage to gain some distance. The fight reaches its effective end when Anubis stabs Jotaro both in the hand and seemingly the gut and takes a moment to boast about his efforts. But it turns out he only got the belt buckle, allowing Jotaro to punch off parts of the remaining blade and crush the hilt, destroying Anubis.

At least they finally have a chance to breathe, but Jotaro knows that was the toughest opponent he’s ever faced because he’s never been this exhausted. Unfortunately for them, the remaining unbroken piece of the blade is picked up by a kid walking by. Anubis takes hold, recalling his original user was the man who created his sword 500 years ago, and he’s survived all this time without a master. Dio apparently saved him from being stuck in a museum, but his own Stand is even more powerful, hence why he swore loyalty to him. Why he’s telling this to himself and not the people he’s trying to kill is anyone’s guess, but he tries one last shot by throwing the blade at them…

…or at least he would have if Iggy hadn’t come by and tripped the kid. Then the show decides to turn into a comedy as Anubis sails through the air to the river. He’s almost stopped by a wall…but passes through. He tries to land on a ship…and lands on the ass of a cow. The cow then rampages because of the pain and falls in the river, leaving Anubis to fall to the river floor. He tries getting the attention of some fish and crabs…but they all ignore him. Anubis is trapped in the water to rust.

Jotaro decides to never hang out with Polnareff again. And because we have a couple extra minutes to kill in the episode, we get a monologue by the narrator about Egypt’s diverse culture to set up our attractive next opponent.

OUR TAKE

Well, THAT kinda petered out there at the end. They were doing pretty well following up on the suspense and scares from the last episode with Anubis, as well as showing how he came back stronger after every fight. They structured his victims pretty well too: First, the meek user with an abusive father whose design didn’t make him look too out of place with the other users the group had fought up to this point, then the barber to show that he could jump bodies and get stronger from observing their moves, and finally, be taking control of the main cast member who is equally strong as he is someone Jotaro doesn’t want to harm. With that in mind, Jotaro destroying the hilt seemed like the best way for Anubis to go out with a literal bang…and then the wrapped it up with a comedy bit that, while admittedly pretty funny, kinda soured the mood, and wasn’t helped by adding very conspicuous padding to the tail end to set up the next episode. It’s a very sudden tone change that still lingers after the episode is over, not unlike ripping a loud fart during the final act of a play.

To put it bluntly, I wouldn’t say that I regret watching this episode, or even that the last part ruined it by any means. It’s still another thrilling fight that explores the ways Stands can evolve and change in interesting ways, but it definitely makes it feel pretty lopsided. Hopefully next week we get an episode whose two halves aren’t as POLARIZING.

…see what I did there?