Spoilers Below

By now we’re all probably aware of Taco Bell’s Doritos Locos Tacos, right? We all must be, because someone is eating all these Dorito-wrapped death-boats that are best consumed either while, or hours after, drinking in excess. And the numbers show that the wild success of these delicious, little beauties is unprecedented.

Well now the Dorito (actually PepsiCo) & Taco Bell people are continuing right along with the next logical – but nevertheless shocking – step: Doritos Locos Doritos.Read that again.
Doritos, that taste like Doritos Locos Tacos. So a Dorito that tastes like a taco that tastes like a Dorito.

Mind officially blown. Imagine if they took it even further and created a Doritos Locos Taco wrapped in a Dorito Locos Dorito taco shell. Instant blissful death. It’s in the Bible – look it up.

Bah, what a diversion. I was reminded of this because in Episode 4 of Sonic For Hire, Eggman claims to have invented the taco sandwich – “two tacos for bread, and in the middle: ten tacos.” This episode was snarky as always, and featured Sonic and Tails attempting to stop Eggman from altering time to gain wealth and power. Unfortunately, the duo is too late, as Eggman has already lost the Epoch time machine – and Crash Bandicoot has it.

Episode 5 sees Sonic torturing Crash for info, a la Taken. He finally gets the location of the ship and electrocutes Crash anyway.

In Episode 6, released on Sunday, Knuckles’ (or “Boxing Glove Guy”) head explodes and Sonic uses his gruesome corpse to defeat Eggman’s robot. While attempting to restore things back to normal, Sonic instead creates a new alternate reality where Gilius Thunderhead (from Golden Axe) is considered the real Sonic and the actual Sonic is a
bath salt fiend.

Of course this calls for a Sonic-Off – or a Spin Dash competition challenge – to determine the real Sonic. Thunderhead fails embarrassingly. Just when all appears normal, someone else steals the Epoch
and Sonic and Tails see on the TV (which is actually an item box from the Sonic games) that Princess Potato is once again president, and – shocker! – Mario is still alive.

Although Sonic For Hire has lately only garnered a few laughs here and there, I’m very excited for Mario’s return for two reasons. First, it’s nice to have a Mario character back on Machinima programming that doesn’t make me want to strangle myself with a Sega power cord (see: Mario Plush Forever). And second, the best episodes of Sonic so far were not just in the seasons that featured Mario, but the episodes and scenes with Mario.

Here’s to his return! … Oh yeah, and follow me (@ Gonzo_Green) on Twitter so you can return to BubbleBlabber and read more of my stuff. See?
See what I did there?

Episode 4: (7/10)

Episode 5: (6/10)

Episode 6: (7/10)