Review: Mike Tyson Mysteries “The Bucket List; The Missing Package”

Yung’s not even trying to be the moral compass anymore.

Overview (Spoilers Below)

The gang takes Pigeon to the park to buy some gnarly drugs. That bag of wannabe poison almost kills the damn bird. As he slowly comes to, Mike and the team are approached by a man named Edward Kunt (pronounced Kewnt) who requests their help in finding his long-lost twin brother. Sorry, that’s not how the Mystery Team works. A year later, when his message reaches the team through the correct channels, Edward has already found his brother, Thomas. But then, Lawrence shows up—a third identical brother who was raised by the trio’s “birth parents.” Luckily, going to Reno and Massachusetts are on Mike’s bucket list, so the gang tags along on the reunion. But when they meet their parents, the brothers learn they are clones that were created when the original Lawrence died. To make things right with his maker, the father murders his creations, including Lawrence II who was in on the plan. Mike saves the team by punching out the old man, but it doesn’t matter because the entire episode was all a part of Pigeon’s drug-induced coma dream.

In the next episode, a workaholic financier named Chris Glassman ordered a pocket vagina and had it sent to his office. When it never arrives, he fears one of the firm’s senior partners, a woman named Christina Grossman, must’ve received it in error. To  save Chris’ job, Mike distracts Ms. Grossman while Pigeon sneaks the sex toy out of her office. While he’s playacting, we learn Deezy—who is still living at Mike’s house—isn’t managing his client’s money very well. After Pigeon returns the package, he can’t find Chris, and opts to personally test the masturbation aide. When the client catches the perverted bird, Pigeon gets kicked out of the office and tosses the used, odorous toy into the firm’s server room. Science, science, science… and next thing we know, the company’s internal A.I. transforms into an electronic “real doll” that becomes infatuated with Chris. In an attempt to play down the singularity angle, the couple appears on Oprah to normalize their relationship.

Our Take

Really, Mike Tyson Mysteries? You’ve resorted to an “It was all a dream,” ending? You’re better than this Michael, Yung, Marquess, and even you, Pigeon. You’re allowed to do weird. You can have clones, and multiple homicides, and even have Mike murder Pigeon, if you must. But this isn’t the 1980s and you’re not a cowboy-themed, nighttime soap opera. You’re a mystery team that only sometimes solves mysteries. Do that! And having everybody except Pigeon continuously mispronounce Kunt may have been funny the first few times, but after a while it… was still pretty funny. Now, that’s your wheelhouse, mystery team!

Sending the team to Chicago and into the world of corporate finance was a good move. It was nice to see Mike and the gang out of their comfort zones—except for Marquess who seemed to have an affinity for a deep-dish pizza, Oprah Winfrey, the Magnificent Mile, improv comedy, Rush Street, Old Style beer, and shady politics. Also, it was shocking to hear how poorly Deezy takes care of Mike’s money. It begs the question: did something like this happen to the real Mike Tyson? Is that why he has to make this absurdist cartoon in the first place? Probably not. Also, finance robots are far more likely to bring about the singularity than sex robots—just saying.

Gregory Austin

A writer, editor, voice actor, beta reader, and foppish Buffalonian socialite. On social media I discuss writing, cartoons, comic books, and why the Communist Manifesto really should've had pictures.

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