Neon Genesis Evanglion: A Survivor’s Guide

 

 

WAIT COME BACK! It’s a good show, I swear!

Last year, it was announced that the hit mecha anime classic, Neon Genesis Evangelion, will be hitting the Netflix streaming service some time in 2019. And if you’re reading this feature, there’s a chance you might just be completely blind to what people both love and hate about this series! To that I say, CONGRATULATIONS! Because I, a fan of the series for over a decade now, am here to guide you through the many quirks and eccentricities of this mammoth of a franchise. It might not have aged as well thanks to being made in the 90’s, but with my help, you too will be writing your college dissertations on the complex mysteries of symbolism of a screaming purple horned robot that gets sucked into the vagina eye of a giant naked lady after a teenage boy masturbates over his comatose friend.

Don’t worry, it gets weirder.

Watching Order:

This is the most common question people are likely to have when diving into any new series with a sizable reputation and background. This series sounds like it has a lot of interesting starting points, but where should I begin my journey?

The most obvious answer would have to be the original 26-episode TV series that will be the first version to drop on Netflix. This takes you through the main iteration of the series’ events that all spin-offs, reboots, and sequels take notes from. Though it’s unclear whether or not this version will include the Director’s Cut versions of Episodes 21-24, which are essential for the complete Evangelion viewing experience. But we DO know that the films Death & Rebirth, as well as the End of Evangelion, WILL be dropping with the series. The former is both a slap dash recap of the series along with the first twenty minutes of the latter, which of course makes it vital to see if you really want to get the true feel for the franchise. Then of course you need to watch the End of Evangelion movie right after, despite the fact that you will have seen the first twenty minutes prior to seeing the actual film.

You might wonder why you should have to watch a clip show in movie form instead of simply going into the movie right after the series, but I have an answer for that:

“Don’t make others suffer for your personal hatred.”

It will make sense later. Or it won’t. I’m honestly not sure anymore.

THAT Ending:

Of course, if you’re going to start with the original series, we’ve got to talk about the show’s infamous TV ending, which was so high concept and ahead of its time that naturally everybody hated it. And they still hate it to this day! But I, as a true intellectual, knew from the start that is was a truly revolutionary an intentional masterpiece that was certainly not the byproduct of creator Hideaki Anno’s overwhelming depression and total lack of a production budget by the series’ end. It was an exceptional piece of work that cemented the show’s status among the legendary greats of anime like Akira, Your Name, and Boku no Pico.

You may notice that I haven’t mentioned what actually happens in this ending. That is because it is something you must experience for yourself once traversing through the truly harrowing adventure that is the previous 25 episodes (plus director’s cuts and the films). I remember when I first watched it in the mid-winter of 2007, split into three parts as per Youtube content rules at the time. I also made the drastic mistake of watching that episode first before any of the others, which unknowingly granted me unforeseen levels of anime knowledge and superiority that I was simply too young to control. It was then I said to myself, in third person:

“He was aware he was still a child.”

The Rebuild Films:

Around the time I was first getting into the series, I also learned that there would be new theatrical versions of the show’s original story, but with multiple changes and twists to what fans like myself were expecting. Of the four planned films, three have been released since this announcement, each diverging more and more from the first path of events. Evangelion 1.0 (or 1.11, it’s final director’s cut) essentially works as an updated recap of the first six episodes. 2.0 (or 2.22) plays generally with the story in Episodes 8-19, but with some major twists that made people start to think that Anno had finally decided to start being a functioning human being again. Then 3.33 came out and it was clear he was not getting better. Such is the price of genius.

Which means 4.0 is probably never coming out. Yeah, I know they announced a 2020 release date, but they said Kingdom Hearts was coming out this year too and WHERE IS IT NOW? Yeah, that’s what I thought. And you know what they say about fandom obsession with release dates these days:

“Love is Destructive”

Accept that nothing in the show means anything:

As you watch the series, you might notice numerous amounts of references and symbolism to Judeo-Christian imagery amongst the objects and the characters and the robots and the angels. Well, you should know ahead of time that, despite the frequency of these references, none of that means anything of actual worth. That’s right, all of that was simply used in this series because the writers thought it would look cool enough and go without being noticed in their country, where Christianity is not nearly as popular as the West. So whatever theories you might be cooking up as you go through the story and try to pick apart what significance this lance has to do with this thing on a cross or why these giant monsters seem to have really biblical sounding names, you just need to remind yourself that everything is, at its core, meaningless. Just like life!

Such is the true intellectual prowess of this series. It is nothing but “Lies and Silence.”

Accept that everything in the show means EVERYTHING:

And yet, the fact that all of these things don’t have any inherent meaning means that it can, therefore, mean ANYTHING YOU WANT IT TO! If you want to assume that the giant blue dodecahedron is a metaphor for your rival poltical party, you go right ahead! If you think the tragically short romance between two gay teenagers is a commentary on our relationship with the environment and climate change, that’s a perfectly valid interpretation! Death of the Author, people! No wrong answers! That’s the true literary power of Neon Genesis Evangelion: Nothing means everything and everything means nothing!

ONE MORE FINAL: I need you.:

I hope this feature has been helpful in showing how much knowledge is required to understand this masterwork of an anime, as well as the fact that any and all knowledge you gain before and after watching it will ultimately mean nothing.

In all sincerity, I am a massive fan of this franchise for a number of reasons. From the great animation to the iconic moments and fleshed out characters, Neon Genesis Evangelion is a really special experience for those who are willing to take it on. So, I hope you give it a try when it comes to your local streaming service.

Thank you, Father.

Goodbye, Mother.

And, to all the children: Congratulations.