THROWBACK THURSDAY REBUTTAL: FUCK YOU PAUL! CODE MONKEYS ‘E.T.’!!!

Paul, I respect you, and I’m going to let you finish your reviews, but Code Monkeys is one of the greatest cartoons of our generation.

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This is a rebuttal to an earlier piece written by Paulie Von Doom

I went into great detail about this show when I talked about G4, and their gross mishandling of their network. But this is a whole different breed, right here.

“Congratulations, everybody. This is a regular carnival of shame.” – Dave

This doesn’t seem like a review of an episode of the show, more like a soapbox for you to proclaim everything you hate about gaming culture, and the derivatives thereof.  While there are some that don’t leave their parents basement, every gamer I have ever encountered has actually seen sunlight, and maybe even plowed a broad once or twice (female gamers included). So, while you base all your hate for gaming and this show on your inability to not beat a marginally difficult game, I’m going to actually review the show.

The entire basis of this show is to be a satire of 1980’s video games and video gaming culture. One of the biggest blunders of the 1980’s gaming scene was E.T.. The game singlehandedly responsible for crashing the American gaming market. Luckily, Nintendo, with the help of a little plumber called Mario, helped fix the problem.

The episode starts with the two main characters, Dave and Jerry, finishing up their games. Dave is naked, with his dick painted green. After an explanation of why, Claire comes in to corral them for a meeting. Before I continue, Big T Larrity should have had his own show. Then again, fuck you, Adam de la Pena.

Larrity tells the group that Game-A-Vision has gotten the rights to ET. Dave gets a pass to a super-secret screening of the movie and his clothes. Jerry gets…drugs from Bennie.

What happens next, would explain perfectly why the ET game sucked. Dave sold his ticket to the movie to the asshole who will become M. Night Shama…Shamalalala…whatever the fuck that douche’s name is. Then he goes back to the office, and bullshits his way through the description of the movie. Meanwhile, Jerry is so hopped up on caffeine, he doesn’t care what’s going on.

They show the game, and it is the absolute worst game imaginable. Before they can go back to tweak it, the game is already shipped out to stores. And who walked out of ET as that happened? Fucking Dean.

The best part of this show is when they parody an actual game in an action sequence. This episode had Spy Hunter. Growing up, this game was amazing and Code Monkeys did it justice. So, the game was hijacked back, and they thought it was all good. Unfortunately, they only stopped one truck, and the other 4 million got to the stores. The backlash was so bad, a kid died from ET induced cancer, another kid lost a baby sister and his parents got divorced, and there was an angry mob march on Game-A-Vision.

Leave it to Larrity to save the day. Before the game shipped, he switched his company’s stickers with Bellicovision. So, the angry mob went after Bellicovision, and Game-A-Vision was saved.

Meanwhile, Dean and Todd got abducted, and sexually assaulted by a ship full of aliens. This was the best anal probing since Cartman got an anal probe. Why? Well, you have to watch the episode. The ending was pretty funny too.

Like I started with, this show is pure satire. Everything, from the 8-bit animation (which was done beautifully), to the sound effects, to the stories, made this a show to watch every week. I implore you: please go watch it on Netflix.

Overall: 9/10

Other episodes to watch:

The Woz

Super Prison Breakout

Todd Loses His Mind

Third Reich’s the Charm

Wrassle Mania

The Revenge of Matsui

The Story of 420

My Pal Jodie

Dave Gets Boobs

Dean in Charge

Drunken Office Party

The Great Recession

Dave’s Day Off

Car Robber Sunnyvale

Cybertron Messiah

Anime, gaming, action, I do it all. Most of it shows up on the Broadcast Bubble show, Gaming on Cybertron. Tuesdays at 9 pm, right here on BubbleBlabber!

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