FIVE THINGS WE WANT FOR @ADULTSWIM’S @thingxinc

Posted on by john

A bunch of writers from The Onion along with Adult Swim’s brass recently announced the launched of Thing X.com, a new site that is out to bring satire of the internet but also provide us with a bunch of interesting shit that the internet is so lovingly known for like podcasts, blogs, polls, and the like.  Aqua Teen creator Dave Willis actually told us a smidgen of what he was working on when we interviewed way back when, but we have some ideas of our own.

5)  Let’s not involve any of the A.V. Club writers as ThingX.com bloggers….deal??

 

The A.V. Club is basically The Onion’s stab at trying to be competitive against terrible sites like the now for sale IGN.com and what I’d hate to see is any of their shit writers coming over and already ruining  what looks to be a great thing. No shitty reviews from wannabe writers, or stupid recaps of shows no one cares about,  The A.V. club doesn’t need to come here and muck anything up as instead we’d love to see some satirical writing similar to what Joe Garden and Chris Karwowski have already done for their opening pieces. The rest of the articles do look a bit The Onion inspired, but as long as its not shit A.V. I think I can handle it.

 

4) We don’t need ANOTHER Funnyordie.com!

 

We have a Funnyordie.com, we seriously don’t need a second one. That’s not to say we don’t like FOD, we LOVE IT!  But, we don’t need ThingX.com being EXACTLY like it. Adult Swim has a pool of awesome talent and with a bunch of writers from The Onion are coming over so  we don’t need a take on Between Two Ferns or a bunch of asshole celebrities like Justin Bieber, Selena Gomez, and Linday Lohan trying to be funny in terribly written video bits. I think a light on some of the best in underground comedy would more than suffice! Let’s get some shit written by guys that never get any limelight on FOD but are still funny like Bill Burr or Janeane Garofalo. There are a lot of funny people out there that don’t get the chance to show their chops more often, and ThingX could do this area justice.

 

3)  Please don’t talk about sports with Onion SportsDome or try and bring back the Onion News Network in any way shape or form.

 

Both of these shows were absolutely horrid experiences if you had ever seen them. For everyone except the nine people that used to watch these shows, Onion had TWO different TV shows premier on television, one called the SportsDome and the other called Onion News Network. Basically, they were both cheap and unfunny knock offs of The Daily Show but the Sportsdome did it with sports and News Network did it with whatever was relevant at the time. In any case, neither could hold a candle to the outstanding writing staff or exceptional on-air talent that Jon Stewart had brought together and we don’t want to see any derivations of that shit on ThingX.com

 

 

2) Share some brands with Adult Swim!

 

ThingX.com would be a great spot for the Aqua Teen inspired “Carl’s picks” or the NTSF web shows, mainly because it would be major brands attracting their fans to a site not a lot of people know about yet, and as such give ample opportunity to bring to life NEW content!  Wouldn’t it be swell if some shit from ThingX.com got SO big it would just BEG for some of its original content to fill up some time slots on Adult Swim??? Hell, ThingX.com might be a great place to showcase a few new pilots akin to what Adult Swim gave us for Black Dynamite. 

 

 1) Cartoons maybe??

 

As great as its live-action programming is, Adult Swim’s bread and butter has always been the toons and as such have built up quite a collection of some of the best animated programming on Earth. Shows like Metalocalypse, Superjail, and Squidbillies have built up Adult Swim into being a powerhouse and ThingX.com would be a great way to find some new and fresh talent plus provide some competition for Youtube channels like Shut Up Cartoons and Mondo Mini. Might be something to look into, eh?? Plus cartoons are typically funny.

  • Gary Dell’Abbate

    Impressive writing for once about a non-animated adult swim topic. Now if you could only figure out how to stop writing in Engrish.

    • http://www.bubbleblabber.com john

      Yea, our English is pretty good. However, if you want chock full of terribly written articles check out Adultswimcentral.com. They are the best at no one clearly checking their work.

    • Walter Witko

      Wow. Talk about tryhard. You may want to learn to spell Gary Dell’Abate’s name right. Fucking idiot. Oh, by the way, we cover animation…so we kinda tend to write about it. It’s terrible content like this comment that will make ASC fall. Oh, and the shit ton of pirated Adult Swim content on the server will probably do that too. Who knows…

      • YourMom

        You’re right. I should’ve made my name “That Cunt” since you love saying disparaging things on an “animation” website. Great journalism.

        P.S.: You might want to back up your *cough*stolen*cough* tagline of being “THE AUTHORITY” by posting some live-action/Toonami news. At least then maybe people would take you semi-seriously.

        P.P.S.: No one knows what “BubbleBlaster” is when I mention it.

        • http://www.bubbleblabber.com john

          Yea I dont know what Bubbleblaster is either. That said, people take us more seriously than they do of you. Proof? You are on our site acting like a troll. As far as journalism is concerned you aren’t in our league, and if you want references Id be happy to give u names from just about every major network on TV. Anything else? Have fun bitching about your Match.com profile on Facebook, douche.

        • UMAD?

          Also, I don’t see how anything on the site is “pirated” especially considering Swim just sent access to the PR site and allowed us into the Press Hour to interview everyone.

          But seriously… you need to learn how to write. I can’t imagine I’m the only one who finds it offensive to my eyes and brain. I’m not saying it to be insulting, it’s constructive criticism.

          • http://www.bubbleblabber.com john

            Access to the PR site everyone gets asshole. Takes two minutes. Your site looks like trash, you have 5 ‘reviews’ and u have a forum where u talk to the other ASC writers. And you must be the only one because I get notes from just about all the show runners telling me how great of a job we do. We get press hours too, unfortunately they are depressing as shit and we are out to change that. Stick to being a fan site. Oh yea, if my writing was so bad you wouldn’t be coming here reading our articles then stealing the info and putting them on your site.

            PS Your writing and the code on your site is atrocious at best. Seriously, no one knows how to do proper ad placement? Eat shit

          • Richard Milko III

            Hi! This is ChefRich from RadioBubble. You realize you’re talking shit about how another man describes cartoons, right?

            Think about that for a few seconds. Reevaluate your life. Then pull the trigger.

          • Batman

            Hi ChefRich! I’m Batman. First off… rather liked your review of Dethalbum III. I sincerely hope (for your sake) that you’re getting paid for reviews and other posts, like we allegedly were going to be.

            Secondly, when someone trolls your own posts and says you can find better writing on this site rather than [as]central, he should probably mean it, instead of being butthurt over a deal gone sour between the two sites.

            I honestly have no beef… although after receiving a wonderful voicemail earlier regarding having my internet at home and work and my website threatened… Nah, y’know what, still no beef. If anything, those little beef bouillon cubes.

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